as much as i

as much as i hate this i feel left behind - not by people in general but by life - life has always been difficult to say the least but for some people its even more so - i am one of those people - i never came from a family with anything so what i get in way of inheritance will  amount to just a few odds and ends - that wasn't my mothers falt and i will not fault her for it but it leaves a person at a disadvantage to say the least - i know lately some people might think i am trying to take advantage of them but i'm not - all my life i gave to it bleeded because i love to help others but now i learned the cold truth - if you don't have money you don't get the true American dream - land ownership - so now i am trying to get the 100,000.00's to get just two acres for me to live the life i dreamed of in my retirement years and after that life becomes reality i will give even more - but until then i have to start looking out for number one and then worry about others - most people say it should have been that way to begin with but i wouldn't change my past if i could = helping others does come with its rewards and for the most part my way made me happier - i have always believed that money currency in general was and is the embodiment of pure evil and recent events from the year 2000 to present day just proves that point tooth and nail.